the inspection team.

And when the realization entered my mind, I hired the inspection team.
Every time I wanted to yell at someone, they would search me.
Every time I wanted to eat out of sadness, they would search me.
Every time I wouldn't finish what I started, they would search me.
Every time I got jealous of every pretty person, they would search me.
Every time little things became big things, they would search me.
Every time my face break out, they would search me.
Every time my jaw would pop, they would search me.

They would look deep inside me.
Fully examine my soul.
Study it through&through.

They would open doors that had big wooden boars in the shape of a 'x' on it so nothing could open it.
They would painfully pull back each board and with all their weight pull until the rusty strong door opened.
They would enter.
They would find hidden basements.
They would find dark secrets.
They would expose&open things that had been closed for many days&trillions of seconds.
And with every painful opening, came honest understanding.

With all my disgust, selfishness, lust, lies, guilt, disappointment, shame, anger, bitterness, failures, embarrassment, insecurities, and ugliness neatly laid out on the kitchen table.
I was naked, completely bare.
The inside of my dark dark soul utterly revealed.
I was a monster.
And they loved me.
The called me their beloved.